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Complete transcript:
Watch this if you're an over-thinker
Person: My coworker made this comment about me the other day. And I went back to my desk and all I could do was think about it.
Therapist: What were you thinking?
Person: I was just replaying it over and over and I couldn't get any work done. I really wanted to go home and hide in my bed and sleep.
Therapist: What was the comment about?
Person: It was about how long it took me to turn in a report. How she was waiting for it and she said it in front of our other coworker.
Therapist: so this active your wound around perfectionism. Someone made a comment that you feel exposed, as not being good enough. And then you went into a shame spiral where that's all you could think about.
Person: Yep, I went home and I thought about it there too. I had dinner plans at night and canceled to binge on Netflix. And then I pictured all of the things I could have said back to her but didn't because I froze instead. I hate that someone saying something can make me spiral like this. I wish I didn't care.
Therapist: You're really sensitive to what other people say because you carry a lot of shame. One comment or reaction opens up that shame wound. And your body goes into fight or flight. The way you know how to soothe is to self-isolate by canceling plans. Or to numb yourself by watching Netflix in order to protect yourself.
Order my new book: https://howtobetheloveyouseek.com/
Get my FREE Relationship Future Self Journal: https://theholisticpsychologist.com/relationship-future-self-journal/
Find me on Instagram: @the.holistic.psychologist
Complete transcript:
Watch this if you're an over-thinker
Person: My coworker made this comment about me the other day. And I went back to my desk and all I could do was think about it.
Therapist: What were you thinking?
Person: I was just replaying it over and over and I couldn't get any work done. I really wanted to go home and hide in my bed and sleep.
Therapist: What was the comment about?
Person: It was about how long it took me to turn in a report. How she was waiting for it and she said it in front of our other coworker.
Therapist: so this active your wound around perfectionism. Someone made a comment that you feel exposed, as not being good enough. And then you went into a shame spiral where that's all you could think about.
Person: Yep, I went home and I thought about it there too. I had dinner plans at night and canceled to binge on Netflix. And then I pictured all of the things I could have said back to her but didn't because I froze instead. I hate that someone saying something can make me spiral like this. I wish I didn't care.
Therapist: You're really sensitive to what other people say because you carry a lot of shame. One comment or reaction opens up that shame wound. And your body goes into fight or flight. The way you know how to soothe is to self-isolate by canceling plans. Or to numb yourself by watching Netflix in order to protect yourself.
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- The Holistic Psychologist, Dr. Nicole Lepera
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